Mother’s Day is coming up and, if we’re honest, it’s a holiday that can either be joyous and sweet or a holiday that can bring about significant anxiety and stress. For some women, the source of this anxiety stems from their relationships with their own mothers, mother-in-laws, or other maternal figures.
Whether it’s unresolved conflicts, unmet expectations, or feelings of inadequacy, these motherhood wounds can cast a shadow well into our adult years causing anxiety and worry.
If you’re struggling with anxiety related to your relationship with your own mother or mother-in-law, know that you’re not alone. Many women grapple with similar feelings of hurt and uncertainty, but there is hope and help available.
Here are some practical strategies rooted in faith to help you navigate your anxiety:
Firstly, prioritize self-care. Take time to nurture yourself physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Engage in activities that bring you joy and peace, whether it’s journaling, gardening, or spending time in prayer. If you don’t know what activities bring you joy and peace, start by trying something new! Remember that you are deserving of love and care, regardless of what people might’ve done or said in your past. They don’t define you – God does and he says you’re made in His image!
If there are unresolved conflicts or unmet expectations, try to release the expectation of “fixing them” this Mother’s Day. Hurting relationships need time, not deadlines. Often, working through grievances is important and trying to rush the process just because Mother’s Day is coming up will not help anyone.
Secondly, seek support from trusted friends, family members, or a therapist who can provide empathy, guidance, and perspective. Talking openly about your feelings and experiences can help alleviate the burden of carrying them alone and provide opportunities for healing and growth.
Sometimes, after receiving good council, we can see areas where we can take responsibility for the hurt and pain between us and our maternal figures. This is where seeking and asking for forgiveness is important.
However, there are times where the responsibility for the struggles and hurts lie with our mothers. In these cases, we can do two things: forgive and have healthy boundaries. Forgiveness doesn’t mean you say it’s okay but it’s releasing the pain from having control over you.
Sometimes, we need good council to discern our way through these. A pastor, wise friend, therapist or coach can help!
Don’t forget to turn to God in prayer and meditation, inviting Him into the broken places of your heart. Trust that He is a compassionate and loving Father who understands your pain and longs to bring healing and restoration to your relationships. Find comfort in Scripture, such as Isaiah 41:10, which assures us that “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
Finally, be patient with yourself, your maternal figure, and the healing process. True healing takes time and may involve forgiveness, reconciliation, and setting healthy boundaries. Trust that God is working in your life, even in the midst of your pain and struggles, and that He has a plan for your redemption and restoration.
Know that you are not defined by your past wounds or your present struggles with your mother.
Through God’s grace and love, you can find peace and strength to navigate the complexities of adult relationships and cultivate healthier, more fulfilling relationships with your own mother or mother-in-law.
If you’re in Florida or Massachusetts, feel free to reach out to me to schedule a free 15 minute consult session or check out the FAQ page. Your well-being is my priority, and I’m excited to accompany you on this path to a life filled with faith, growth, and serenity.
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Disclaimer: While Britt is a licensed therapist, this post is for informational purposes only and may not be the best fit for you and your personal situation. It shall not be construed as medical advice. The information and education provided here is not intended or implied to supplement or replace professional medical treatment, advice, and/or diagnosis. Always check with your own physician or medical professional before trying or implementing any information read here.